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lovestruck humbug
cuddling in a kundle
hug crushes
tongues stunk
mud lungs
hunkered gums
wondering cherub bunkered in a bungalow
robbed of holly
sorry that i barely call you
i needed to be subdued
i’ve been imbued by fall hues
autumn blues stretched to february
and i’m wondering what the news used to be
worn down by shorn tears
predictive searches break me down
this routine breaks me down
i’ve missed magic
we smell sour when we cry
balmy cheeks pressed against chests
tearstained and soulcrushed
can’t imagine what it would be like
to be there again
eyes closed hoping this half tab takes me
seeing what i saw when i was asleep that night
imagined desires
blue moss
gumdrops and metal gum floss
pink water and your lips, naturally
speaking in our own tongue
our friends left befuddled
softness often felt funny
but seemed somber
once the nonsense was washed off
you showed me the sky
we shared so many clouds
things that belong to everyone
belonged to us
to be young
functioning under auspices of nothing
unctuous bloodsport
no use in crying
a sickness like none other
now here’s your host
im caught in cobwebs
cotton balls in my cheeks
i reek of the rotten stench of belonging
pain found its new home
sulking sideways on sepulveda
los angeles is my nightmare
my plants are dying but so am i
what was it like to be alive
the smell of spit rubbed into skin
peeling callouses from palms
bright red blood emanating from fresh scars
there are two things i hate more than myself
one is capitalism
the other myself
sorry i was lying
invest in community
unionize your emotions and
save my name in your goddamn phone
i didnt ask for this
i asked for a hand and
you gave me a round of applause
im the specimen
im the scab you keep picking
im the ingrown hair on your neck
im the new pimple you just found
im the gunk under your fingernails
im the stone in your shoe
im the metallic taste in your mouth
im the burning sensation in your loins
im the hardest part of your favorite song
im the softest promise you keep breaking
im the worst part of your morning
im the reason you wake up tired
im the reason you need to be around people
im the reason you hate the sun
i am the sun
two hearts
two cruises
feeling stupid
pulling useless cards
meandering plans
chances on a grand piano
glass chips
sunkissed
being told to do what to do
feeling as if your entire existence is wrong
arguing with yourself
having to convince yourself
trying to prove that you’re right
being okay with the fact that you’re never
im gonna give this another go at it
dont mind me
just collecting empties
sometimes im comforted by the fact that nobody hates me as much as i hate myself
01 sometimes im comforted by the fact that nobody hates me as much as i hate myself.mp3
