We all have our New Year's traditions. Some people wear diapers for a day and a half, standing in ankle-deep muck in Times Square to watch the back of Anderson Cooper’s head during commercial breaks until they’re kettled out of the asshole of the earth at the stroke of midnight. Some people throw on When Harry Met Sally or Phantom Thread. Some eat greens with black eyed peas. Others drink champagne and eat caviar.
In my apartment, we pull the electric heater that looks like a fake fireplace out of storage. I wake up my kids at exactly 11:40:41 if they fall asleep early. We gather around the Bluetooth speaker in front of the fire, and as the ball drops, we listen to “East Noo YAWK”’s Uncle Murda reflecting on the year that has just passed.
For those unfamiliar, Leonard Grant, or Uncle Murda, is from Brooklyn’s infamous Louis Heaton Pink Houses near the Linden Multiplex, a few blocks from the Conduit. He had the good fortune of being managed by DJ Green Lantern in the dying days of the mixtape-as-industry farm system.
In 2007, Murda was in the right place at the right time. His proximity to Brooklyn royalty landed him on Fabolous’ “Brooklyn” remix, and he’s still somehow coasting off those fumes today. He spent time on Roc-A-Fella as it dissolved, then landed on the G-Unit ghostship in the late 2010s, where he apparently remains to this day (he’s apparently been on tour with 50 Cent for the last six months). According to his own Wikipedia page, after almost two decades as a professional recording artist, he’s never released a studio album.
I’ve always enjoyed the idea of Uncle Murda, if not the work of actually sitting and listening to him. He has one of the great all-time monikers in rap history. I believe there’s a trunk in Uncle Murda’s attic, and if you should open it, a child’s ethereal tenor calls across the room to the heavens. His voice has always been weathered, ugly, abrasive, and perfect. That has never changed, and I wouldn’t say he has a single elite skill as a rapper. There isn’t an Uncle Murda hook, or punchline, or flow that stands out in my memory. But he was blessed with an unstoppable motor, and he’s completely and utterly shameless. So 19 years later, here we are.
The tradition of an end of the year recap in verse originated with Virginia's Mad Skillz, who made the Rap Up a delightful end-of-year tradition starting in 2002. But in 2014, without any apparent invitation or excuse, Uncle Murda jumped on Skillz’s corner and started making his own versions concurrently. Skillz ignored it until 2017 when he finally pushed back, eviscerating Murda with a diss track, but time comes for us all, and after an 18 year run, Skillz didn’t answer the bell at the end of 2021, leaving the role of rap’s annual griot to Unc.
Murda said he started doing his own Rap Ups because he thought he could bring something that was missing to the table. He’s not exactly wrong. His Rap Ups were the “R-Rated Version,” while Mad Skillz delivered the PG-13. There is an interesting contrast between the two approaches to the same concept. Consider 2014, the first year both men tried their hand at the exercise. Skillz opens celebrating Lupita Nyong'o’s well-deserved Best Supporting Actress Oscar for her role in Steve McQueen’s 12 Years a Slave, reflects on Ellen’s much celebrated and incredibly corny Oscar selfie, and reports on who won the Super Bowl. Murda opens with a rumor that Diddy put his hands on Drake, claims that Troy Ave got ILoveMakonnen snuffed, and related a Chris Brown IG post where he claimed that his girl fucked Drake. Skillz was making fun time capsule recaps speaking to a monoculture in the dying moments of the idea as a possibility; Murda was pursuing a much slimmer demographic.
When we talk about the deleterious effects of the internet on society, we most often focus on young people: How social media and screen addiction is shaping the way children, our future, grapple with life. We don’t spend enough time considering the ways it affects people like 43-year-old Uncle Murda, who is most certainly a very on his phone type of older Guy. In the manner that turn-of-the-century college students once swapped out “The News” for John Stewart’s Daily Show, others have abandoned harsh reality for The Shade Room, a news outlet fed by an economy of Black celebrity gossip. It’s sports-adjacent and rap-adjacent and thirst trap-adjacent, a digital supermarket checkout tabloid with nearly 30 million subscribers.
In Uncle Murda’s hands, the Rap Up became a dark and disturbing recitation of which minor celebrities have beef, who was arrested, who may or may not have snitched, who cheated, and who played themselves in an Instagram story. It's a return to Hawthorne’s small town puritanical red letter justice in a digital age—rife with a 90s high school mean girl ruthlessness and a northeast Black conservative alpha male’s homophobia and misogyny. Unc released three (3!) installments of the Rap Up this year, which clock in at nearly 20 minutes total, and I can only describe the act of listening to it as having pure poison funneled down into your ear. There was a draft of this that recounted everything Murda said on all three tracks, “We Didn’t Start the Fire” style, for another three pages. But when it was done, I decided it was a) Very evil shit, and b) I couldn’t imagine Nina’s readers being invested in who Lori Harvey is currently fucking.
Click on the YouTube links above and spend the next 20 minutes considering how Uncle Murda and those like him digest another horrendous year, as we draw ever closer to the end of the American experience—or don’t. Happy New Year! - Abe Beame
Sacramento, Ca.
DB.Boutabag - “Can’t Control It”