Q: What brought about the name, “Live Ambient Meltdown”?
A: Basically, I've just always had this mental image of totally bombing onstage during a live performance, but it's a small DIY art scene setting so it's not even dramatic or newsworthy, it's just really sad and uncomfortable. I think about these kinds of things all the time because I've been on both sides of that scenario before.
Performing in front of any sized group of people is always unintentionally funny to me, and there's no way around it; no kind of onstage pranks like wearing a mask or having some other person play your set for you can ever hide it. I just feel like an idiot up there. So to bomb unintentionally is the true performance ideal or something. The tape player not working, your keyboard notes being wrong and off tempo, visibly shaking even though there are only four people in the audience and you literally know all of them.
Q: What, if any, would you say are some themes that you have been exploring on recent releases, and do any of them correlate to this latest release?
A: The themes have mostly been the same as they always have been for me: being upset and frustrated and trying to inflict that kind of emotional pain onto the listeners but in a way where they aren't going to notice it at first. I feel like there isn't really a general thematic idea aside from pointing to the obvious that reality is pretty tough and it's very Real out here. I see so much messed up stuff happening and I have to stay making this shit or I would probably go insane.
Most different on this release I guess is me thinking a lot about environmental terrorist organizations. My feelings about violence have changed a lot as I've gotten older and I mostly deeply fear it now, but sometimes I still wonder if some things can only ever be changed with force. I like to think of making ambient music more like writing in a diary or organizing a bunch of rusty, messed up tools. To me it's perfect when it sounds like a scrapbook or a junkyard.
On a more positive note, I like to tell myself I'm an inspiration to anyone who has no idea how to play any musical instruments or any ability whatsoever to use "Digital Audio Workstations" or any compositional competence or anything like that. I can't do any of that stuff. Also you don't need any money, you can make any of this stuff for free, even GoodWill is expensive now, so just go on Craigslist free or look on the side of the road for stuff, and if it's broken, try to use it anyway, If you still have no options just make stuff with rocks and sticks.
You don't even have to record it, just carry around a huge piece of wood and smash trash cans while freaking out and screaming. Someone will probably film you and you'll go viral, and you can call that your first "single".
